Secondary Trauma is a phenomenon where a person or persons who have not experienced the trauma themselves show symptoms of the trauma. In the case of the Child of Trauma it is most often the care giver (foster or adoptive parent) who experiences this kind of trauma.

Charles Figley indicates that secondary traumatic stress "is the stress resulting from wanting to help a traumatised or suffering person." There is also the stress of living with a child that is constantly difficult, hard to reach, un-pliable, or seemingly disobedient. Burnout occurs the most in "helping professions" like medical care, social workiers, teachers, and parenting. This is a kind of burnout that causes you to feel mentally exhausted, you can feel desperation, and can feel like a failure. Even in the times that you feel like you aren't making a difference, cling to the fact that you are - some day that child will look back and realise that you never ever gave up. Being a fostadopt parent is likely going to be the most difficult job you ever take on.

Distress can manifest itself in a variety of ways. You can feel anger, sadness, grief, anxiety or depression. You might find yourself becoming isololated, or cynical. You may experience mood swings. You might find yourself being irritable with your significant other or with family members. You might have frequent headaches, your stomach may become upset, and it is common to feel fatigue. You may feel like running away.

Fostadopt parents are particularly at risk. This is because they work so closely for long periods of time with one or more individuals who have been hurt badly.

The number one coping mechanism for fostadopt parents must be to find ways to have some kind of respite care. Even if it is only for a few hours where the parent can get away from the stresses of parenting. It is critically important for significnant others to take care of one another. Our efficacity is dependent on our ability to be physically and emotional as stable as possible.